Logline

Honeymooning on the islands of Bocas del Toro, Panamá, the magnetic and darkly funny TERESA (she/her) grows fatigued by her people-pleasing husband, DREW (he/him). In an impulsive move to inject some excitement into their waning connection, Teresa persuades Drew to embark on an intimate experience with expat PAZ (they/them). This initially reignites their spark, but it also begins to stir a raw energy in both Teresa and Drew, unveiling hidden desires and secrets that threaten to transform their relationship forever.

Trailer

Director’s Statement

I Really Love My Husband is about the claustrophobia of a millennial relationship, and what happens when you do everything you’re supposed to do to be happy, but you’re still just not.

As a writer-director, I’ve always been drawn to stories about female ennui. I love the messy, tangled gray areas that are exposed when our deepest desires come head-to-head with expectations — our own, our partner’s and society’s.

When we meet our protagonist, Teresa, on her honeymoon in Bocas del Toro, Panama, she’s reached the tipping point after a year of marriage, and finally gives herself permission to hunt for her own joy, even if it costs her everything she’s supposed to want.

That hunt, however, sets Teresa on a journey that will expose her worst self. We’ll see that ripple through a gaggle of expats — her husband, Drew, the vacation rental host, Paz, and a former Survivor contestant, Kiki. Their path to happiness requires them to reveal their whole selves, including the parts they’d rather keep hidden.

I Really Love My Husband is a quietly queer film: Teresa, Drew, Paz, and Kiki, embrace many genders and sexual arrangements on their path to understanding, and, through this exploration, also open doors for others. This film plainly accepts the spectrum of gender and sexual fluidity, without judging or dramatizing it. Rather, we look at the universal human tendency to either settle and live in a state of stasis, or to spiral out of control. Sometimes it’s the latter that pushes us toward promising new directions.

The process of making this film required me and the whole cast and crew to relinquish control. Filming on an island with no roads, on a constrained timeline of five months from conception to shooting, and with an ultra low budget forced us to step outside of our comfort zones. But the trust, teamwork, and shared vision of the entire team made it possible.

I’ve shared this journey of making my first film in real time as host of the No Film School podcast — I’ve spoken about my mistakes, learnings, regrets and what I am most proud of. I hope that my in-the-moment openness about the making of this film inspires emerging filmmakers to take the leap, even when they don’t know exactly where they will land.

And speaking of leaps, I hope you enjoy your leap into the world of I Really Love My Husband, as we examine the poison permeating a relationship that looks great on paper, while celebrating complicated, flawed characters, our story and ourselves.

— GG Hawkins, Writer + Director of I Really Love My Husband

"An island in Panamà?!"

Why Panamá?

When GG and Elle participated in the Microbudget Producing Workshop through The Gotham Film & Media Institute, one of the most important takeaways was to develop a script around something unique that you have access to — a “superpower” that will set your film apart.

One month after the workshop, GG pitched Elle on the idea of making a film in Bocas del Toro, Panamá. See, GG’s step-dad, Peter, a British expat and the inspiration for the character of Paz (pictured in Bocas just to the left of this text!), moved to the islands in the 1990’s and planned to live on the island of Carenero for the rest of his life. Sixteen years into his Bocas life, Peter met Andrea, GG’s mom. Fast forward to one marriage and GG’s brother born in Panama, the family continued to build community in Bocas, and eventually, moved back to the states, renting Peter’s beach house out as their primary source of income.

The community and location of Bocas became the superpower of I Really Love My Husband. Here’s GG on developing a story around Bocas:

When I wrote this script, I knew I wanted to film it in Bocas del Toro, Panama. Its unrelenting beauty and the slow pace of island time contrasts with Teresa and Drew’s neuroticism and emotional heaviness. The juxtaposition is dramatic and often comical.
— GG Hawkins, writer/director

The very first audience to see the near-finished film was the community of Bocas, at a private friends and family screening on Isla Carenero in the summer of 2024. The production team then shared the film with the Panama Film Commission at Cine Universitario at Universidad de Panamá, along with a No Film School podcast conversation featuring Panamanian filmmakers: writer-director Maria Isabel Burnes (Tumbadores) and writer-director Arianne Benedetti (Mas Que Hermanos and Despierta Mamá).

Meet the Team

GG Hawkins

Writer + Director
GG's (she/her) work has been showcased around the US at Tribeca, Nantucket, Sonoma, HollyShorts, and more. She wrote and directed "G.U.F.," an episode of "You Feeling This?" that premiered at Tribeca in 2023. She received the Channie Award for Best Directing for her web series, 'Kinda Flakey.' GG's short 'An Aspirational Space' was awarded the Robert De Niro Scholarship. She is a fellow of the Film Independent Episodic Lab. She hosts the No Film School Podcast, interviewing talent such as Kelly Fremon Craig, Ray Romano, and Justin Kuritzkes. She is repped at Curate for film and tv. She really loves her partner and her favorite drink is the Carenero Colada from Coquitos.
Elle Roth-Brunet

Producer
Hailing from rural Iowa, Elle (she/her) founded and led Google's Entertainment Marketing department, forging partnerships with Hello Sunshine, Paul Fieg's Powderkeg, the Producers Guild of America, Women In Film, and the Black List; and brokering over 200 product integration deals with UTA. She's produced 11 shorts that have gone on to screen at Slamdance, SXSW, SeriesFest, Palm Springs and Aspen Shortfest, and the Nantucket Film Festival. She left the corporate world to produce full time last year. Her first feature Moloka'i Bound, written and directed by Alika Tengan, secured distribution from Gravitas Ventures and premiered at the Seattle International Film Festival this past May. She really loves her husband and her favorite drink is the Passionfruit Marg from Bibi’s.
Maria Laura Ventura

Co-Producer
Maria Laura (she/her) has almost a decade of experience in filmmaking as an independent producer and production executive at The Walt Disney Company/HETV. She’s overseen 20 productions at Disney including Extraordinary 1 and 2, Culprits, and Wedding Season on Disney+. Her work has been shot in over 20 countries, with films spanning budgets up to 300M. She has produced five independent feature films including To the Girl I Once Knew and Trendy, which premiered at Raindance in 2017. She really loves her husband and her favorite drink is the Green Chitra from Coquitos.
Ryan Thomas

Director of Photography
Ryan (he/him) is a member of the International Cinematographers Guild, and an ASC Vision Mentorship fellow. He's had two films play at Sundance (Squirrel, Place). He has shot for Nickelodeon, MTV, Rolling Stone, Facebook, Geico, Redfin, and Comedy Central doing both union and non-union work. More at ryanthomasdp.com. Ryan and GG have known each other for 28 years, and have been working together for three. He really loves his wife and his favorite drink is the world-famous piña colada from Bibi’s.

Production & Partnership in Panamá

Our Producer Elle and co-Producer Maria Laura Venture teamed up with Panama-based, women-run production companies Seedling Media and Milagros, working with Brittany DeVries, Maria Neyla Santamaria and Anabel Gonzalez. The production partnered with the Panama Film Commission, local businesses, and hired a Panamanian crew to ensure an international co-production.

We knew logistics would be a challenge, so it was imperative that we hire Panamanians and work with local talent that knew the business and the island community. Brittany DeVries and Maria Neyla Santamaria were phenomenal partners in helping us navigate the Panama film commission, the visa rules, finding local crew, and helping us think through where to spend money and where to save. They brokered all our local deals, brought on local crew, and helped me get accustomed to shooting on the islands and navigating the complexities.
— Elle Roth-Brunet, producer

Our partners on Isla Carenero made this production possible. We filmed on location at Bibi’s Restaurant and Coquito’s Bar thanks to the support of Penny Tom. We also had craft from Bibi’s, who came on board last minute to provide fresh, healthy food. Alex Rodriguez hosted half the crew at his B&B Zona Tropical — and made a cameo in the film. We also shot at Aqua Lounge and Hospital Point with the support of local community members. Finally, Mayor Emilianos Torres and the Bocas Mayor's Office supported the film by providing a permit. Mayor Torres even lent us a boat to film on!

Meet the Cast

Madison Lanesey

Teresa
Madison (she/her) is an actress, comedian, and writer living in Los Angeles. She wrote and starred in the short film, Yes, Daddy, which premiered at the Mammoth Film Festival and screened at HollyShorts and Salute Your Shorts. She's acted in indie features including The Misadventures of Vince and Hick and What the Elf, which premiered at the Dances with Film Festival. You can regularly find her on the UCB comedy stage on Harold night, Maude night, or performing with the prestigious Baby Wants Candy. Madison also does commercial work, including for Bravo, which also just happens to be her greatest passion in life. She really loves her boyfriend and her favorite drink is the world-famous piña colada from Bibi’s.
Travis Quentin Young

Drew
Travis (he/him), a bayou native from Westlake, Louisiana, garnered acclaim for his role in the short film, The Replacement Child, earning accolades like Outstanding Performance by an Actor at the Winnipeg International Film Festival and Best Actor at the Barbados International Film Festival. He’s had notable appearances in TV series and films like ABC Family's Teen Spirit, Lifetime's Devious Maids, HBO's Vinyl, and Showtime's Who Killed Cooper Dunn. His voice skills led him to join a prestigious loop group in Los Angeles, where he contributed his talent to over 25 feature films, including iconic titles like There Will Be Blood, No Country for Old Men, and Happy Feet. He really loves his girlfriend and his favorite drink is the Amapola from Bibi’s.
Arta Gee

Paz
Arta (they/them) is an actor, athlete, and model. They grew up in The Bronx, New York and represent nonbinary and queer identities globally in ad campaigns and high fashion runways for Alexander McQueen, Balenciaga, Chloe, Coach, Fendi, Louis Vuitton, Rick Owens, Nike, and many others. Much of their time is dedicated to intensive training in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and high-impact stunts, stemming from interests in lead roles for action films, drama films, and comedies that are avant garde and push the boundaries on gender and human relationships. I REALLY LOVE MY HUSBAND is their feature film debut. They really love their life and their favorite thing about Bocas were the water taxi rides and the late night star gazing while soaking in the warm waters of Isla Carenero.
Lisa Jacqueline Starrett

Kiki
Lisa Jacqueline Starrett (aka Jacq) is an actor that is passionate about meaningful storytelling. Their deep care for each character has resulted in many award-winning films, including Nine Days (Sundance 2020), Get Away (Academy Award Qualifying 2023) where they won numerous "Best Film" and "Best Actress" awards, and starred in To Die Alone (2023) which has taken the festival circuit by storm this year. Alongside acting, Jacq is passionate about trauma psychology. They are a Trauma Counselor Advocate for a nationwide survivor program and a Mental Health Coordinator for tv/film. They are also COO of Project Contrast, a non-profit empowering LGBTQ+ youth in rural areas. They really love their family and their favorite thing about Bocas are the animals, especially the dogs and sloth 🦥